The key to happiness. The secret to a happy life.
Find the happiness within you.
I was in the depths of despair in a violent relationship and pretty much hit rock bottom.
I felt trapped and hopeless, like I had no way out. But then I found the key to happiness.
Someone told me the serenity prayer, which you may have heard of, but it goes like this:
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change. The courage to change the things I can. And the wisdom to know the difference.
They were the perfect words I needed to hear at that moment in time.
It was incredible, because the wisdom to know the difference is what changed my life. That knowledge helped me turn my life around. It is the key to happiness.
Finding true happiness
I’d already worked out I had to accept the things I couldn’t change. I couldn’t change him.
I’d tried everything already and nothing had worked.
I had thought:
If I change my behaviour then he’ll be happy.
If only I had said this, instead of what I ‘provoked’ his anger, then things might have been okay.
All I had to do was to change my behaviour, to affect a different outcome.
Until I realised, you can’t change another person. Only they can change themselves.
But I can change me. I can find happiness within me.
And that was one of my most liberating turning points of my life.
It was exhausting trying to rescue my relationship. Twisting myself into pretzel shapes trying to make this doomed relationship work.
Now here was somebody saying forget all that!
Give up trying to control the uncontrollable. Just focus on changing you.
Find your happiness within
I thought: Wow! That’s a lot less exhausting! I can do that.
That was the first step I took towards my freedom and a happy life.
It’s as simple as this, trust me. It is the key to happiness.
You just have to let go of trying to control what’s out of your control. Focus on you instead.
Life shouldn’t be that much of a struggle. It’s way too short.
If you’re pushing shit uphill, then maybe you’re pushing in the wrong direction and it isn’t meant to be.
If you let go and it falls into place, it’s a clearer sign it is.
Stop trying to control everything. Take your hand of the wheel.
Let go and trust that there’s something greater than yourself. Whatever you feel most comfortable with – God or Allah or just your destiny.
Put your faith in that. Then work on yourself.
Make yourself the best person you can be. Someone high in self esteem, good at setting strong boundaries. The rest will take care of itself.
When you do that, it’s incredible what happens.
[bctt tweet=”If you’re not bogged down in chaos, you’ll be still enough to see the little miracles that will change your life.” username=”beingunbeatable”]
You’ll be aware of that person who comes into your life out of the blue.
You’ll hear it when they say something you’re meant to hear, at the right moment in time.
You’ll understand the message teaching you about yourself. Heed the lesson you need to learn.
You’ll be open to an opportunity that presents itself. One you might never have dared take before.
You’ll no longer fear it.
These are the sliding door moments in your life.
You can stay in the pain of your struggle. Or choose the path that will take you towards a more incredible life.
Open the door your stubborn self will is presently blocking the entrance to. Stop slogging down the path you think is best for you, but is hurting you so much.
It’s a bit like that that scene in the film Bruce Almighty.
Morgan Freeman is God and Jim Carrey’s character Bruce is furious with him. He’s running out onto a busy highway and it’s pouring with rain.
Bruce is blaming God for not giving him all the answers.
He’s hit rock bottom and in a crazy frenzy.
At the same time there’s all these trucks and trailers flying past him.
On the back of all of them are huge neon signs. They’re flashing the messages so bright you can’t miss them:
Go this way! Go that way!
The signs are showing Bruce the way. But, he can’t see them. He way too immersed inside his head and crazy drama.
It’s the same with us. It was for me.
Find your happy way
You have to be still to see the signs telling you which direction to go in. The little miracles that are meant to be and start to fall into place when you let go and allow them to.
I’ll say it again, this is the key to happiness:
Accept the the things you can’t change.
Have the courage to change the things you can.
Find the wisdom to know the difference.
[bctt tweet=”You can’t control anybody else or anything around you. But you can change you. ” username=”vivian_mcgrath”]
So, focus on you.
Find the happiness within.
Let everything else go.
Watch for the little miracles or signs that show you the right way to go.
Once I did that my my life became almost effortless. Calm and drama-free, as a friend of mine calls it.
There are no mistakes in life.
Sometimes when we go down the wrong path, we are going in the wrong direction. That’s okay. It’s not a mistake. There’s no need to beat yourself up over it.
It’s just a wake up call for you to remember you need to let go again. And trust that if you do so your destiny, or better path, will find you.
But first, you need to stop getting in your own way.
Are struggling to let go? Are you exhausted from trying to control the uncontrollable? Let me know in the comments below.
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